Being a super parent is important to you. But in addition to being a great parent, you want to be so much more, including excelling at your job; having great relationships; and being an excellent friend and spouse. You also want to have a beautiful, amazing home. That’s a lot of pressure — and stress.
According to a survey, 88% of working parents suffer stress-related health problems. Parenting can be stressful. And we often overlook that this stress can have real health consequences. The table below shows a breakdown of some of the health-related problems that working parents have experienced, including fatigue, anxiety, depression and insomnia.
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Many things can bother your mind. However, learning to cope with these thoughts can help you handle the stress. There are many stress management tools. The key is to figure out which ones work best for you and then put them into action. This will help you receive the stress relief you deserve.
Stress affects every person differently. It can disrupt your sleep, affect your appetite (weight gain or loss), give you headaches or stomach problems, as well as affect your concentration or irritability. Also, your immune system can be weakened and make you more susceptible to illnesses. So, how do you calm and erase this stress and just enjoy parenthood?
Stress Management
Accept your worries. Sometimes you start to worry about something and find yourself unable to stop. You may have stayed awake at night worrying that your baby would stop breathing during the middle of the night. And no matter how many times you’d check on them, you couldn’t stop worrying. Eventually you have to realize that you have to accept the worry for what it is–just a worry. It doesn’t mean that it could happen. Worrying isn’t going to prevent this from happening. You have to accept that you have done all that you can to prevent this from happening and now it is out of your hands. Once you accept that (and the presence of the worry) you should be able to let it go.
Parenthood. Remind yourself of the reason why you wanted to become a parent in the first place. Rather than losing yourself and worrying about how something awful might happen to your child, remember the wonderful moments of parenthood–the laughing, the smiles, the special memories.
Remind yourself that your worries rarely come true. You might have noticed that the things that you worry about usually don’t come true. If something bad happens, it is usually something that you haven’t even thought about. And if it does actually happen, it isn’t as bad as you thought. Don’t worry about what will happen. Accept that there are things that you can control and some that you can’t. Even if you can prevent some things from happening, there isn’t any way to predict every thing that could go wrong. So try and stop the things that you can by being aware and understand that bad things might happen regardless if you worry or not.
Good service providers. Let others do the worrying. Surround yourself with good service providers. You absolutely love your pediatrician and your daycare providers. You could not trust them more. They are knowledgeable, caring, and wonderful with your kids. They treat your child like they would their own and because of that, you have less to worry about. If you don’t trust your child’s service providers 100%, find new providers who you can trust.
Have other things in your life. Besides being a parent, having other things in your life is important. It is easy to become worried if you don’t have enough time away from being a parent. If you are able to get away from parenthood, it can give you a great perspective. Additionally, having a support system of other parents to talk to can help you to realize that whatever you and your child are going through is normal. Hearing from others that they’ve made it through the challenges that you are experiencing will help you deal with your stress.
Direct your energy. When you are really stressed, you use the nervous energy to accomplish things. Sometimes you clean the house. Other times you work on work projects. Sometimes you workout and sometimes your hobbies use the energy. If you direct your nervous energy into something productive, it can help you get your mind off of your worries.
When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.
Workout. Exercise is a natural stress reducer. When you are relaxed after a workout, you will worry less and be able to be the best parent you can be!
Know that most parents worry from time to time. It is very common. Almost every parent has said that they worry about their children. It might be time to look for help if your worries are interfering in your life.
Mistakes. Children make mistakes. Let them. By trying to protect your kids from every potential threat, you don’t allow them to learn to cope with challenges on their own. You should allow your child to make mistakes so you both can learn how to cope with them. This will help you both in the future.
According to the Child Development Institute, there are 52 proven stress reducers:
- Get out of bed fifteen minutes earlier.
- Plan for the morning the evening before.
- Don’t rely on your memory. Write things down.
- Do nothing.
- Make duplicates of all keys.
- Practice preventive maintenance.
- Be prepared to wait.
- Don’t procrastinate.
- Plan ahead.
- Don’t put up with something that doesn’t work right.
- Allow 15 minutes of extra time to get to appointments.
- Reduce your caffeine intake.
- Set up a contingency plan (just in case).
- Relax your standards.
- For every one thing that goes wrong, there are probably 10 blessings. Count them!
- Ask questions.
- Say No!
- Turn off your phone.
- Turn needs into preferences.
- Simplify.
- Make friends with non-worriers.
- Get up and stretch periodically.
- Wear earplugs.
- Get enough sleep.
- Create order out of chaos.
- Check your breathing during and after high pressure situations.
- Write your thoughts and feelings down.
- Try yoga whenever you feel the need to relax.
- Inoculate yourself against a feared event.
- Diversion may be just what you need when the stress of having to get a job done gets in the way.
- Talk it out.
- Select an environment which is in line with your personal needs.
- Learn to live one day at a time.
- Do something you really enjoy everyday.
- Add some love to everything you do.
- Take a hot bath or shower to relieve tension.
- Do something for somebody else.
- Understand rather than being understood.
- Do something that will improve your appearance.
- Schedule a realistic day.
- Become more flexible.
- Eliminate destructive self-talk.
- Use your weekend time.
- Take care of the todays before the yesterdays or tomorrows.
- Do one thing at a time.
- Allow yourself time everyday for privacy and silence.
- If an especially unpleasant task faces you, do it early in the day and get it over with.
- Learn to give responsibility to others who are capable.
- Take a lunch break.
- Count to 100 before doing something that could make matters worse.
- Have a forgiving view of events and people.
- Have an optimistic view of the world.
Try one, two or all fifty-two!
Take the time to learn to relax and remember:
- Be forgiving
- Tomorrow is another day
- Be thankful for the good things that happen each day
- Don’t hold grudges
- Take one day at a time
This information is provided to supplement the care provided by your physician. It is neither intended nor implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice. CALL YOUR HEALTHCARE PROVIDER IMMEDIATELY IF YOU THINK YOU MAY HAVE A MEDICAL EMERGENCY. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider prior to starting any new treatment or with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition.
